Boom boom boom, gotta get-get
Boom boom boom, gotta get-get
Boom boom boom, now…
With that, the Black Eyed Peas opened the 2009 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show.
Alessandra Ambrosio led off the show in some ridiculous ensemble that only Victoria’s Secret can get away with, followed by a bevy of beauties traveling through the galaxy in their skivvies. It was a spectacular start to an annual event that in recent years has lost its archangels Tyra, Gisele, and temporarily Adriana, leaving helium-voiced Heidi to shoulder the awesome responsibility of collecting seven figures for working a couple of months of the year. Despite being a Heidi-phile, I came this close to declaring that she could have stayed home with newborn Lou Sulola and her other Seal pups, because between the Black Eyed Peas and a great cast of models, I was settling in for a great escape. Until the Victoria’s Secret Model Search, that is…
Doutzen Kroes opened the All Aboard segment, which featured models wearing dainties from yesteryear. I was not crazy about the music choice, but the outfits were great. Marisa Miller presented the Million Dollar Bra, which in these recessionary times did not include matching sparkly panties. Bubbly Behati Prinsloo led the PINK Planet parade, and for the first time I was able to enjoy PINK’s schoolyard energy without visions of To Catch a Predator dancing in my head. For a moment, I thought that the show was going to to get back on track, but my hopes were dashed when yet another installment of the model search came on.
If I wasn’t so put off by the Model Search, I would have probably appreciated the flora and fauna themed lingerie more. Unlike the show producers, all I took note of was that some big breasted blond girl named Kylie beat out another big breasted blond girl named Jamie Lee…THE END (although I do want to know how they were able to inform the winner that she won based on votes cast on December 1 when the actual show occurred on November 19).
That said, Miranda Miller opened the last segment, Romantic Journey, which spent a considerable amount of time on Angel for a Day Kylie, and the 2009 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show ended with what appeared to be the stingiest finale ever. So the show that started out with a bang (or boom) went out with a whimper. Now, the runway portion of the show was quite good – it’s just that the problem was that the great cast and clothes were overshadowed by the contest.
The Standouts
The Most Valuable Player award goes to Abbey Lee Kershaw (who I used to hate) for pointing, kissing, and shaking three VS looks, and for providing two of the best moments with a booty-flashing ‘call me’ move, and a memorable shimmy with the Black Eyed Peas. Expect to see that on the Best of reels for years to come.
